In Tulsa, restaurants have signs that say, ``Sorry, we're open.'' - Roseanne Barr
The world makes you into a bitch, no matter how quietly you go, so you may as well go kicking and screaming. - Roseanne Barr
I hate the word housewife; I don't like the word home-maker either. I want to be called Domestic Goddess. - Roseanne Barr
I know how to do anything - I'm a mom. - Roseanne Barr
Men read maps better than women because only men can understand the concept of an inch equaling a hundred miles. - Roseanne Barr
The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it. - Roseanne Barr
Experts say you should never hit your children in anger. When is a good time? When you're feeling festive? - Roseanne Barr
The thing women have got to learn is that nobody gives you power. You just take it. - Roseanne Barr
To expect life to treat you good is foolish as hoping a bull won't hit you because you are a vegetarian. - Roseanne Barr
The most out-there thing I’m saying is, ‘Don’t have babies. Don’t get married and have kids. Have a larger life than that. - Roseanne Barr
Women complain about premenstrual syndrome, but I think of it as the only time of the month that I can be myself. - Roseanne Barr
I figure when my husband comes home from work, if the kids are still alive, then I've done my job. - Roseanne Barr